Friday, October 29, 2010

Confessions of a Foodaholic

I should watch carefully what I eat. All the time. Everyday. I cannot bear to see in print, in stark black and white or any other color, my BMI - body mass index. Last I checked it was not in the obese category, but not far away. 

I exercise, but not enough, and eat too much. And my metabolism is really, really slow.

So today I ate well, until the evening. This is confession time. 

I dug into the Hershey kisses kept in a bowl on a high shelf, usually taken down only when company comes. I do not know why I did it. I like chocolate, but can eat only a little before my body rejects the chocolate and me. 

Hershey’s is not even one of the best chocolates. If I am going to have forbidden fruit or chocolate or cake or anything else, it might as well be the best. Make the guilt worthwhile.
I fall off the diet track often. Actually I am rarely on a real diet track. I am doomed to be not thin or slim or even average weight. Motivation may be high, but willpower abysmally low. 
I know women who could eat everything until they hit menopause. Not one of the lucky ones, I had a weight problem since a teenager.
 I try not to make eating an obsession, but it must be in my genes, my cultural heritage and upbringing, childhood, and social life, all revolving around food. Good food. Lots of it. 
 There is no answer to my dilemma. While all around me people look slim and lose weight, I do not. On the other hand there are so many overweight people I do not feel out of place. Maybe I should. Maybe that would be an incentive to lose excess rolls (body and bread rolls).
Or maybe I need to learn to be happy with who I am.
Who am I kidding?

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